Executive Decision

Shirley – tea Lady excelsis
In the age of re-branding,
rubbish collection as waste management
medicine as health care
food service as catering,
she called herself a key lady – endearingly and resolutely.
Said,
“I’ve been a tea lady 40 something years
still making tea,
blowed if I’m going to call myself anything else.”

Ours was her last staffroom –
had been there almost a decade.
“It’s a lovely place, but with the kids gone
and getting my pension … the hours ” –
9 a.m. to 11 a.m.
and
2 p.m. to 4 p.m.
I’m tied up all day, for half a day’s pay,
but I don’t feel ready to retire, just yet
oh listen to me, I should be grateful.”

She must have listened to herself.
And
had a friend,
who wouldn’t mind part, part-time either.
They will job share – Two weeks on, two weeks off,
and be each others locum.
A good deal for both. Effective immediately.

They tell the director
he is incensed :
“I appoint staff around here, not the bloody tea lady.”