Category: Unexpected

An unscheduled visitor at an unexpectedly quiet time
a woman seeking work
I take some details.
Several weeks later a vacancy arises
convenience remembers her
can bypass advertisement, application and interview
a phone call and meeting
one concern
she seems above this type of work.

Her story told without emotion is moving. Not uncommon.
A teacher who has never taught
married at 21, four children quickly followed.
Her husband shoulder tapped : The United Nations.
Overseas postings. An enviable lifestyle and interesting life
the world’s capitals and some of its trouble spots.
After two decades a return to the country of their birth.
Now in her late 40’s she has been traded
for a younger, slimmer, blonder model.

A good settlement, a house, a car and lump sum
but still a need to buy groceries and pay the utilities.
She holds my eye
I would be very grateful she says.

It works out well. Competent, hard-working and surprisingly strong
alienated by co-workers by her former status
she sometimes asks questions which are not
but hopeful hooks to land the catch of conversation.
After the divorce he was still a person of influence
she no longer.
Abandoned and lonely
questions detour around solitary confinement.

One summer my loved one has winter Christmas in her homeland
in a workplace where lives are watched carnivorously
everybody knows.
The former special assistant’s wife attempting to build dialogue
from circumstances
from commonalty
from no longer being the only one
notes we are both single
perhaps we could go to a movie,
then stammers backwards into silence at her unintended forwardness

An awkward pause
which I fill with “ or something. ”
Her eyes slide to intense study of the floor
her head hangs – hands twist in supplication.
Or something she says in a small voice.

Awful awareness understands loneliness as never before
so lonely she would sleep with me
not for advancement
not for money
not for gratification. For company.

We both experience sudden shock
at the comprehension of the possible impermissible.
For the rest of the time in the same workplace
we maintained rigid separation.

It was a threat
delivered as question
large part brinkmanship
small part condescension
successful in the past
a sheep dog’s scowling fangs
intended to cower
not bite
to direct compliance
in compliant direction.
She said
do you want to separate?
“Okay.”

Adolescence coincided with the 70’s
loose hair – tight jeans
soft notes of West Coast rock
push aside 60’s guitar gurus.

The Eagles and Fleetwood Mac the new kids in town
less noise, more polish
angst spoken quietly
capturing sales and critics. Win win.

Feminism also reduced volume
the polemic of Germane Greer and Simone de Beauvoir
replaced with the persuasion of Marilyn French
and Boston Women’s Collective.

The new literature read by a callow identity
determined to value and appreciate women
imagination rehearses dialogues of inequality
and meaningful closeness.

Revolution breed in the captivity of academia
is often released to an unready catchment
earnest intensity rebuffed by women barely ex-teenagers
the second sex happy to be both.

Newborn sensitivity carefully explained
the need to render invisible the imbalance of gender
and receives puzzlement and abrupt termination – an auction with no bids.

In a tobacco stained voice she asked what was wrong.
Cynthia, in her late 40’s probably
age blurred by three plus decades of smoking
the question self answered. “Girlfriend problems?”

Time and place parent unlikely friendship
vacation factory work
stations serious youth alongside relentless cheer
three months of constant chatter builds comfortable dialogue.

Disclosure confesses inability to find meaningful other
cigarette voice smoke signals absolution
“when the right one comes along …. you’ll just know
I did with each of my three husbands.”
She had not been widowed.