Category: Truth

Our father instructed us to gather in the living room.
An announcement
a one person show
no supporting act
no props or accompaniment.
Our baby brother was ill
very ill
something  eye tis
he would be in hospital a long time
might not come home. Ever.

We are permitted to go to bed
unbathed and without prayers
a dispensation not awarded even to Christmas eve.

Every grouping and profession has an absolute truth
known not to be
whispered certainty shouted out loud.
sorority allegiance, fraternity oath – unquestioning.
Airline pilots are never frightened.
Stockbrokers always see opportunity.
Politicians certain of victory.
Boxers trash opponents as whipping boys.

For a time faith turned away from pomp
preferring weekday liturgical snacks to
full meal of Sunday High Mass.
Devotee as consumer. Worship a la carte.

With lack of clutter and ceremony
expectation predicted a more reflective service.
Possibly one quiet thought stretched to insight
Not always. Sometimes the lunchtime express. No stops.
One day
surprise
from a source judgement thought supercilious.
An explanation of scripture and the role of prayer
taught by doctrine to be communication with God.

He said he was 73 years old
had been a priest for 51 of them.
In all that time and prayer
only once
for a single hour did he find that connection.
Just that one time – many years ago
the rest of his priesthood
spent in pursuit of re-encounter.

A veil lifts and anguish recedes
dawn streaks of resignation
puncture the darkness of grief.
It has been a long way back.

Friends have become indifferent
boredom has replaced concern.

In youth, pride cloaks emotions
insouciance and detachment project
counterfeit messages of the heart
always play it cool – never flinch.

Now truth is important
even as it betrays desperation.
Madness stalked
waiting patiently
expectant
not quite welcomed
not quite evicted. A close run thing.