Category: Before the Rain

No Post.

Somehow without ever being asked
or directed to
he became my immediate superior.
He had been my hero – no longer,
but I still admired him,
still glowed when invited to work with him,
still held his word as received truth.

He said about the visiting brass
said in his real or adopted countryman’s voice
that it was the same everywhere –
no 1 was a PR man,
no 2 was the one to look out for – the hatchet man.
“Number one goes around shaking hands
number two goes around hatching …. or hatchet-ing.”

Number two
official title: Assistant Director General
subtitle: Head of Personnel
I am brought to him, like a concubine to an Emperor.

The handshake was limp, soft
the face also
flesh peeking over bone, like pastry from a pan
pastry coloured – not quite cooked
weak jaw pouched by good living
hair the colour of sun on apricots – receding to high forehead
voice thin and slow of foot.
Impression: pale and insipid
but
the eyes weren’t –
taut, lean and muscular,
they clamped me the whole time.

He asked what I did
listened without apparent attention or enthusiasm
then summarized brutally
“so you’re just helping..”
yes…..
………. but I’m….
Time is up
this is Heathrow or LAX
the controller’s focus is needed elsewhere.

The mistake of act opening for star
or first season ballplayer
or freshman congressman
more concerned with not screwing up
than taking a chance to shine.

Perhaps Jesus is to blame
to blame for conversion been more esteemed than consistency.
Before his time the world was God fearing
conform ? – You bet, no one stepped out of line
not when the Angel of death was the enforcer.
Ever since the second testament hit the book stands
the faithful have clenched teeth
at
recaptured waistlines superior to the non-expanded
spendthrift turned thrift, better than always frugal
reformed alcoholism as proof of character.
Perhaps the devout felt the same
in the years 0- 33 AD
adulater’s
thieves
prostitutes and murders the new celebrities
and holier than thou. Literally.

He had been a gambler in his time
a card shark some said
playing with his own deck
marked –
and with at least as many Aces as sleeves
in the end he had turned up trumps
and now ran his own casino. Clean,
outlaw turned sheriff. Bandits, he could spot them.

The hierarchy was present
the brass heavy and shiny at his retirement –
the head serang
and his deputy
and more acolytes than a visiting head of state.
The not always good employee
had turned good
and done good.
The only person missing
his defeated rival
someone who had never been anything but good.
Conversion the spoils. Consistency nothing.